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Thank you 2020

“One day we will look back at the events of 2020 and laugh”

Whoever says this needs a slap!

I certainly will not look back and laugh, that is unless you count demonic hysterics broken up with tears and screams as laughter.

From lockdowns to fights over toilet rolls, from hoteliers playing at being political leaders, a real version of Whitehouse Down, conspiracy theorists who believe the world is flat and QAnon is JFK jnr, we have seen it all.

And now, as we start 2021 the aftermath of 2020 still haunts us. The world continues to fall apart, the Dutch are rioting, France & Germany are about to go into full lockdown again, the UK doesn’t rule the waves anymore and here in the UAE our Facebook Moms Groups are talking doom & gloom while getting vaccinated to take advantage of discounts from mercenary businesses.

Just yesterday I watched and listened to a father walk his young daughter around the local supermarket meticulously calculating every step he took to make sure he avoided being anywhere near another human while loudly narrating a live commentary to his bewildered child…. “ oh lets not go down that aisle, there are more that 3 people there”, “Never buy loose fruit, you do not know who has touched it” and as he shopped he would spray every item with his personal disinfectant before putting it into a dirty, potentially bug infested shopping cart!

Although 2020 taught us the importance of hygiene, and made the wearing of a face mask normal, sadly 2020 also created a scary and growing number of experts we now have. Medical, nutritional, exercise, mental health, political and legal experts, we now have more than we ever had before and each have a wealth of Google expertise they believe licenses them to force their opinions and Whatsapp forwarded facts down our throats.

2020 also missed a golden opportunity to link COVID with Audi’s and vegans, we missed a chance to wrap all three into one category of things we wish we never get or become!

Personally I will miss 2020, I will miss how it exposed the true colors of some of those around us, I will miss its unpredictable torture and I will miss its reminders that most of what I thought was important in my life was in fact a burden on my happiness rather a luxury.

2020, I will miss you, you helped me make decisions I would have previously shelved, you drained the swamp of assholes, liars and pretentious leaches, and for that and more I applaud you for it was you who slapped reality back into my life!

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